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The Elephant of Surprise ๐Ÿ˜

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The kids were watching "The Jungle Book" earlier tonight. I was in the kitchen, half-listening for the songs, when they got to the part of the movie where Bagheera is asking the elephants for their help in finding Mowgli. Colonel Hathi then turns to his troops, gives his orders, and tells them that they will have the "element of surprise."  But that is not what I heard. What I heard was "Elephant of Surprise."  So, here we are. I decided to go with a Chaotic Neutral Fey. I'm envisioning a creature who sneaks up behind you and yells "BOO!" before collapsing in a fit of laughter.  As your party progresses through the woods, the Ranger catches sight of a creature up ahead: an elephant standing upright on its hind legs, hiding behind a tree. You are stunned to realize that if your scout hadn't said anything, you would have walked right past the creature without noticing. The Elephant of Surprise CR: 7     Huge Fey     HD: 11d6+55 (91...

Gegnomes

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Genome /jee-nohm/   • full set of chromosomes; all the inheritable traits of an organism      • a conglomerate of genetists playing God and conducting insane experiments in the name of "SCIENCE!" The Gegnomes are an organization of gnome genetists. They offer a wide range of services, including cloning, gene-splicing, and other forms of genetic manipulation. They have created a wide range of humanoid/animal hybrids in their secret laboratories. There is a special division that deals in cybernetics and another that labors to reanimate the dead. • have been based in Germany since the 1940s - headquarters in Dresden (in the Forgotten Realms, they would be based in Lantan; on Krynn, Mt. Never-ending, a.d so on) • developed and implemented Eugenics programs for the Nazis during World War II • derisively referred to as "Gnazis" or "Little Lethal Lawn Gnomes". • main building is shaped like a double helix • Hat Color indicates department:     ...

Titanium Cranium

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A long time ago, I came up with the idea of a campaign involving different generations of characters. This would be a story that would unfold in chapters with callbacks to previous adventures. NPCs, both helpful and antagonistic , would show up repeatedly over the course of years. The campaign would begin during the American Revolution and move forward through the Old West , Prohibition , World War II , the 1950s, Vietnam, and then the 80s . Titanium Cranium (a.k.a Amos Whitmann): male Gadgeteer 2/Metahuman 2 CR: 6     Medium Humanoid (Human, Mutant)     HD: 2d8+4 plus 2d8+4 (28 hp) Init: +1     Spd: 30'     AC: 11 (+1 Dex); t: 11, ff: 10 Attacks: (BAB +2; Grap +2) ; +2 Unarmed Strike: 1d3 (20/×2) or +2 Head Butt: 2d4 (20/×2) or +3 Sonic Blaster: 1d4+1 (20/×2, 100', max 480') SA: Class Features, Mutant Abilities SQ: Class Features, Mutant Abilities Align: LG     Saves...

Creeks and Crawdads - Revisited

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As we near the end of the year, I am sort of wrapping up things I have started or have been sitting on for a while. I originally did a post on Creeks and Crawdads a long time ago but while working on pun names (Shrim Possible, Shrim Kardashian, Shrimothy, Shrim Shady), I started thinking that maybe I could go back and refine crayfish stats. Leonardo daPinchi : male White-Clawed Crawdad Thinker CR: - -     Fine Vermin      HD: ¼d8 (1 hp) Init: +1      Spd: 1’, swim 5’      AC: 19 (+1 Dex, +8 size); t: 19, ff: 18 Attacks: (BAB +0, Grap -21) ; +0 Pincers: - - SA: - - SQ: Amphibious, Vermin traits Align: N      Saves: Fort +2, Ref +1, Will +0 Str: 1, Dex: 10, Con: 10, Int: --, Wis: 10, Cha: 1 Skills: Read/Write and Speak Italian, Hide +18, Swim +8 Feats: - - • Amphibious (Ex): Crayfish can survive out of water for one hour per point of Constit...

Scary Flying Shark

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My youngest boy is obsessed with Sharks. And dinosaurs. But, for a loooong  time, it was Sharks and only Sharks. It didn't matter if they were real-life Sharks or Cartoon Sharks. Baby Shark's Big Adventure played on repeat for much of 2021. And then, one day, a video made its way into the "Recommended for You" list on YouTube. It was a short, catchy toon and there were dozens of animated videos to accompany the song. That song was "Scary Flying Shark" by Boom Buddies. It told the story of the eponymous shark, its death, and its subsequent hunt of children. He loved it. More recently, he has discovered (i.e. rifled through the DVDs upstairs) the 1980s Dungeons and Dragons cartoon and realized that the show was based on the shelves of game books that take up much of the wall in the living room (beholders are his current favorite). This has led to me needing to provide stats for the previously mentioned "Scary Flying Shark". This is basically...

Rumblestrip - Autobot Skirmisher

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Rumblestrip : "Male" Cybertronian Robot (Transformer, Powermaster) CR: 8     Huge Construct (Shapechanger)   HD: 6d10 plus 40     Hp: 75 Init: +4    Spd: 50' or xxx in vehicle mode    AC: 24 (-2 size, +15 Natural), t: 8, ff: 24 Attacks: (BAB +4/Grap +22) ; +12 Slam 1d8+10 (20/×2) or +2 Particle Beam Rifle: 8d6 (20/×2, 75', single or autofire)      * Autofire targets a 10'×10' area, Ref DC15 to avoid SA: Alternate Form SQ: Cybertronian Durability, Cybertronian Traits, DR10/--, Powermaster Traits Align: CG     Saves: Fort +2, Ref +2, Will +3 Str: 30, Dex: 10, Con: --, Int: 13, Wis: 12, Cha: 10 Skills: Read/Write and Speak Common and Cybertronian; Computer Use +11, Disguise +10 to appear as a normal dragster; Drive +9, Knowledge (Technology) +10, Navigate +6, Repair +5 Feats: Advanced Firearms Proficiency, Heroic Surge (b), Improved Initiative, Personal Fire...

Throwback NPC: Mary Sawyer (Who Had a Little Lamb)

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The party first met Mary Sawyer and her ram companion, Aries while traveling through the Checkerboard Kingdoms with Jill, wife of King Jack . The group was on its way to the pasture of the Cow That Jumped Over the Moon so they could ask the Man (although they would later learn that it was Men) in the Moon if he had seen what had happened to Jack after he fell from the Hill. Mary was investigating several missing people and suspected Bo Peep and Little Boy Blue of engaging in human trafficking to replace sheep they had irresponsibly lost/killed/allowed to die. A brief battle ensued that resulted in the two erstwhile slavers being brought to justice and Cedron acquiring the Witching Cloak. Mary Sawyer : female Grimmlands Human Ranger 4 CR: 4     Medium Humanoid (Human) HD: 4d8+4 (24 hp) Init: +3     Spd: 30'     AC: 17 (Masterwork Studded Leather Armor, Masterwork Light Wooden Shield, +3 Dex); t: 13, ff: 14 Attacks: (B...