Smurf Wars
I ran a "side quest" for some of the player in my play-by-post campaign so they could earn some bonus Xp and help me flesh out the world we were adventuring in. To make things more interesting (or just stranger depending on your point of view), they assumed the roles of Smurfs. This adventure would take place just after the beginning of the first Smurf movie and is based on the King Smurf issue of the original comic book series.
Below, there are sections divided by dashed lines. These represent the post for the players and sections in parenthesis are my "Director's Commentary" about what I had going on, the writing process, etc.
I hope everyone enjoys this - or at least doesn't hate it. It was definitely one of the stranger stories I have attempted.
King Smurf (1828 Grimmlands calendar)
The
Blue Moon Festival was approaching. Clumsy Smurf was out running errands at the
behest of Papa Smurf when he accidentally drew the attention of the evil
wizard, Gargamel.
The
wizard pursued Clumsy back to the Smurf Village. The Smurfs panicked and
scattered with Clumsy, Papa Smurf, Smurfette, Grouchy, Brainy, and Gutsy racing
toward the Forbidden Falls with Gargamel hot on their heels. All of them were
drawn through a vortex at the Falls and disappeared.
- - -
- -Peace returned to the village but the remaining Smurfs didn’t know what to do without their leader so they held an election. Through demagogic speeches, false promises, and in some cases, out-and-out bribes, one Smurf rose to prominence and was chosen by his peers. Soon after, he outfitted himself in clothing of gold and a lavish Red Cape trimmed with fur and commanded the other Smurfs to call him “King”. At first, the other Smurfs did not take him or his self-bestowed title seriously so King Smurf appointed one as his personal enforcer (now known as Secret Service Smurf or “Triple S”) and established a totalitarian regime. He then used his influence to sway both Editor Smurf and Reporter Smurf to publish articles and spread news that portrayed him in a positive light.
King Smurf
had the other Smurfs build him a castle and surround the village with a wooden
wall to keep out “undesirables”. Any dissenters were imprisoned in the dungeon
beneath the castle. Jokey Smurf gave the king one of his exploding presents and
was labeled a dissenter and was made into the First Example.
A dam
on the River Smurf gave way but the raging floodwaters were turned aside by
King Smurf’s wall. The king blamed the “terrifying attack” on a band of Red Caps,
a malicious breed of faerie folk who live to the east of the village.
What Really Happened:
Even with the support of the media and his guards, King Smurf was still faced with growing opposition. He finally hatched a plan that would secure his rule by giving his subjects a common foe. King Smurf stole a large number of Jokey Smurf’s exploding presents and used them to blow up a dam on the River Smurf. The raging floodwaters were turned aside by King Smurf’s wall. The king then blamed the “terrifying attack” on a band of Red Caps, a malicious breed of faerie folk who lived to the east of the village.
It did not take King Smurf long to realize that he had made a mistake – even a single Red Cap was far too dangerous for even a score of Smurfs to defeat. He would need to recruit heroes.
Smurf Wars: White Hats vs. Red Caps (1829 Grimmlands calendar)
King Smurf
recruits defenders from the village to deal with the Red Cap threat that he
inadvertently created. The Smurfs
selected include Apprentice Smurf and Clockwork Smurf (because they are
expendable) and Actor Smurf (because he is friends with a fire-breathing pseudodragon
named Grumpf and if Actor goes, then Grumpf goes too).
Daily Posts:
Apprentice
Smurf, Clockwork Smurf, and Actor Smurf are summoned to the new castle in the
center of the Smurf Village. Grumpf the
Pseudodragon follows the three diminutive fey inside. Several pages direct them to the throne room
at the center of the fortress. When they
are announced by a herald, they find the recently-elected King Smurf inside,
seated upon his golden throne with Secret Service Smurf standing at his side.
The
King rises, resplendent in his gold pants and red fur-trimmed cloak and smiles
at the party. The king begins to descend
the short dais and walk toward the group.
Secret Service Smurf stalks along silently behind him, his eyes hidden
by a pair of glasses with darkened lenses.
(There are rumors about SSS actually being Hefty Smurf since he hasn’t
been seen out in town since the election but these have yet to be
confirmed).
“Greetings,
my loyal subjects!” the King says as you approach. If he is at all threatened by the presence of
the dragon, it does not show on his face.
“Thank you all for coming today.
We are sure you know why you were summoned but, we ask for a moment’s
indulgence to be certain you understand the gravity of our call. As you know, our village was recently the
subject of an unprovoked, terrorist attack from a band of Red Caps living in
the forest beyond our wall. The vicious
faerie folk destroyed the dam holding back the waters of the River Smurf in an
attempt to flood our beloved homes. We
want the three, or we suppose, the four of you to locate these vandals and
eliminate the threat they pose to our way of life. Do you understand the importance of your
mission?”
- - -
-In response to King Smurf’s question, Grumpf belches up a cloud of acrid smoke. The pseudodragon’s tail lashes back and forth impatiently like a cat’s when it watches a mouse hole. Clockwork Smurf lets a string of blips and chirps that everyone understands as an affirmative response while Actor launches into a long-winded speech that draws confused looks from everyone around until he clears his throat and simply finishes with, “Yes. I understand.”
Apprentice
Smurf tastes the air with his forked tongue.
The green-scaled wizard frowns, "Your
Majesty, how are the four of us supposed to defeat a band of Red Caps? They are
one of the most dangerous creatures to be found roaming in the woods. Even
Gargamel stays clear of them."
Clockwork chimes in that he will handle the
threat the vicious faeries pose, drawing a skeptical look from his green
companion.
The dragon’s “voice” then sounds in each of
the gathered Smurfs’ minds, "Your Majesty do we know where the Red Caps
live? And do they have any weaknesses we can use against them?"
King Smurf looks at the dragon and then at the
rest of his selected champions, “We do not.
That is why we have summoned You.
Triple-S, be a good lad and show our guests out.”
The black-garbed Smurf faces the group, his
eyes hidden behind his spectacles’ dark-lenses, “Let’s move.” Once the group reaches the main gate to the
palace, Secret Service Smurf stops and tells them, “If I were you, I would
search the forest east of the river. Red
Caps tend to enjoy watching the suffering they cause so they won’t have gone
far. Be careful out there.”
As Triple-S then turns and walks back inside,
Grumpf “overhears” the king’s bodyguard silently add, “it would be hard to find
another group of freaks as expendable as you.”
- - - - -The small band of Smurfs departs, bound for the river, in search of the Red Cap faeries who have declared war on the peaceful village. Actor growls, pretending to be a mighty warrior from one his plays, threatening dire consequences to any Red Cap the group should stumble across but Apprentice warns him to be cautious as the creatures are far more dangerous and unpredictable than their gruesome appearance would seem to indicate – especially given that each is more than twice the size of the Smurfs. Clockwork whistles and hoots in agreement with the scaly green wizard.
Grumpf snorts, releasing a cloud of smoke from
his nostrils and informs the diminutive blue fey that he will find a way for
them to cross the river when they get to it.
The dragon’s promise proves to be unnecessary now that the water being
held back by the destroyed dam has flowed downstream. Not enough snow has melted to cause the
waters to rise and though the water is cold, the Smurfs are able to ford the
now shallow waterway. In the distance,
they can see a family of beavers chewing sticks and wedging them into place as
they try to rebuild the dam. The bottom
of their lodge is exposed, leaving the aquatic rodents vulnerable to
attack. When the furry beasts see the Smurfs,
they scramble into the shallows and try to hide but there is not enough water pooled
behind their nascent structure for them to submerge in.
((The beavers are afraid of Actor Smurf but not the rest of the group – Clockwork
and Apprentice smell fundamentally different.
Although the animals cannot speak, the fact that they are unfriendly
toward a Smurf (which has Wild Empathy as a racial ability) should be the first
indication that something is wrong with King Smurf’s story.))
- - - - -As the beavers hunker down in the water, Grumpf thinks a greeting in their direction. The creatures, already skittish, bolt for the dubious safety of their lodge when they “hear” the pseudodragon’s voice inside their heads. The dragon’s eyes narrow as it squints, concentrating even harder as it thinks slower and “louder” in the aquatic rodents’ direction.
“HEY,
BEAVES, WHAT’S SHAKING?”
The
critters continue to scurry away, scrambling for the lodge’s exposed entrance
and disappear from view. The dragon
huffs in frustration, a small wisp of smoke escaping from his nostrils. Unable to understand what he is doing wrong,
the dragon thinks about his tiny blue friends.
All of the Smurfs, regardless of the role they fulfill in the village,
are beloved by all woodland creatures – from Feathers the Stork to Squeaky the
Mouse. The fact that the beavers fled so
quickly from the tiny cerulean fey is a testament to the evil that has settled
over the woods.
Clockwork
barely gives the beavers little more than a passing glance before wading across the
shallow stream and climbing the far bank.
Actor however, slows and picks up a leaf. Hiding it behind his back, he begins slapping
the water with it. One of the beavers sticks
its head out of the lodge’s entry tunnel.
It cocks its head to one side so it can hear better and sniffs the
air. The beaver shuffles forward a few
steps and then rises onto its hind legs, observing Actor’s antics, curiosity
slowly overcoming its fear.
Apprentice
makes his way over to the remains of the dam.
His black forked tongue darts in and out, tasting the air. He scuttles forward, trying to stay out of
the frigid water and catches the scent of sulfur. He drops to all fours and begins crawling
slowly along the ground, his long blunt tail held out straight behind him as he
homes in on the source of the odor. In
moments, he finds a scrap of yellow paper with burns around all of its edges. A few more seconds of searching turns up more
of the paper and some scraps of red ribbon but no sign of the Red Caps.
((The yellow and red scraps are the charred remains from several of Jokey Smurf’s
exploding presents. There are tracks in
the area that lead off to the east but they are far too small to have been made
by a Red Cap – which is twice the size of a Smurf. These tracks were left behind by Triple-S and
King Smurf after they used Jokey’s presents to blow the dam but they do lead to
the den of a particularly vile Red Cap named Brindleshanks.))
- - - - -Grumpf abandons his attempt to talk to the beavers and takes to the air, circling overhead to get a better view of the wreckage. What he sees surprises him – snapped twigs and burned branches radiate out from the dam’s previous location in a roughly circular pattern, as if some great force had hurled them in all directions with a tremendous velocity.
Actor
approaches Apprentice Smurf and the two of them inspect the burned
paper. “That color looks familiar. I know that I have seen it before…” the
dramatic fey’s voice trails off as he tries to remember and then, suddenly, it
clicks for both of them. “I
remember!” They shout together.
“The
yellow paper is the wrapping” Actor begins.
“And
the red is from the ribbon” Apprentice continues.
“On
one of Jokey’s surprise presents!” they finish together.
Apprentice
frowns, “But Jokey has been locked away for months.”
Actor
nods, “Yes, ever since he got King Smurf with one of his tricks.”
Clockwork
chirps and buzzes to draw the attention of the other Smurfs and the
dragon. He points at the ground and a
trail of footprints he has found leading away from the ruins of the dam. They’re a little on the small side for a Red
Cap but the trail is clear and leads off to the east, the rumored direction of
the vile faeries’ lair.
- - -
- -The Smurfs and the dragon begin to follow the tracks leading away from the ruins of the dam. Skeletal trees loom overhead, naked branches clawing at the gray-leaden sky. The smell of moldy leaves fills the air. Animal tracks vanish as the group treads along the path ahead of them. Birdsong and the chirping of insects fade away until the haunting silence becomes all-encompassing, broken only by the soft tread of the Smurfs’ footsteps and the beating of Grumpf’s wings. Creeping streamers of moss hang from the barren trees. A cave of limestone and dirt comes into view. The roots of blighted trees poke down through the earthen ceiling of the low cave. The iron tang of blood hangs thick in the still air, radiating outward from a copper kettle hung over a low-burning fire.
As the group slowly makes their
approach, a sarcastic, sing-song voice shatters the still, “It can seeeee
them. Can they seeeee meeeee? Will their blood make myyyyy hat blue? Will they be tastyyyyy?”
((Red Caps
are murderous and unstoppable.
Although appearing to be a gaunt old man, Red Caps are armed with sharp claws
and teeth. They have super strength and could, conceivably, overpower a fully
grown man. As if that isn’t scary enough, they also carry around a scythe,
which they use to hack and slash people (and anything else they come across) to
death.
After they brutally murder their victims, the Red Cap mops up the blood with its cap, hence the name. These fairies are also alleged to be cannibals who eat both humans and other fairies.))
- - -
- -
Actor challenges
the voice, basically daring it to “Smurf like a Smurf”. Apprentice reaches out and slaps the back of
his friend’s head, warning him that that is a good way to get killed. The fledgling wizard calls out, asking the
source of the voice to come out and talk, hopefully avoiding any
bloodshed. Actor curses this time,
saying that Apprentice’s gentler approach is going to get them killed
instead. While the two Smurfs argue
about the best way to handle this situation, Clockwork begins to emit a loud
piercing whistle, trying to draw the creature out. Grumpf lands on a nearby tree branch, his
draconic eyes searching for signs of the speaker.
The
dragon’s wait is short. A glowing green
stone flies out of the root cave toward Actor.
The Smurf sees the missile at the last second and manages to twist aside
but the rock strikes him in the side of the chest, bruising and possibly
breaking several bones.
“I’LL
SHOWS YOU WHAT NEEDS VIOLENCE AND WHAT DOESN’T!
AND THEN, I’LL BE ADDING A FEW NEW COATS OF BLOOD TO ME HAT!”
Actor:
28% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
100% health
Grumpf:
100% health
((Originally, I was going to have Brindleshanks attack Clockwork to silence the
siren noise but I rolled a Natural 20, confirmed the Critical Hit and dealt 16
damage (which would have been enough to one-shot every member of the
party). For the sake of story, I
switched the attack to Actor (because he hadn’t been “properly respectfully” of
the Red Cap and re-rolled, doing only 5 damage instead)).
- - -
- -The Smurfs scatter after the vicious attack. Clockwork snatches up a log, one far too large and heavy for a normal Smurf to lift but he has the strength of 100 Smurfs and hefts it with ease. As the robot begins to stalk toward the vile fairy, Apprentice backs away and throws a handful of sand into the air. The lizard-skinned Smurf shouts the word “Sleep!”
The Red
Cap grins evilly, drool dripping from in between its jagged teeth as it stalks
toward Actor with its huge scythe held at the ready when Apprentice’s spell
hits him. The Red Cap yawns and staggers
forward a few steps, stopping to rub its eyes.
It shakes its head and yawns again before toppling forward onto its face
and smacking the ground without even trying to catch itself or break its fall.
Actor
stops in the middle of a spell of his own, still clutching his side and begins
to make his way over to the fallen fairy.
Grumpf pulls out of his dive, fire as yet unleashed held in the back of
the pseudodragon’s throat.
((I looked up an English to Smurf translator – going to have to remember that for
the remaining dialogue in this adventure.
Turns out that the English to Smurf translation for the command “Sleep”
is simply “Sleep”. Actor was originally
going to cast lullaby. I was going to
type in the lyrics to “Rock-A-Bye Baby”
“Rock a bye baby on the treetop, when the wind blows, the cradle will rock, when the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, and down will come baby, cradle and all” translates to “Rock a bye baby, on the treetop, when the wind Smurfs, the cradle will rock, when the bough Smurfs, the cradle will fall, and down will Smurf baby, cradle and all.”
I know – not much of a translation but I think I’m going to run with it anyway. If nothing else, it Might help provide some authenticity to dialogue I have trouble with anyway.))
- - -
- -“Rock a bye baby on the treetop, when the wind blows, the cradle will rock, when the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, and down will come baby, cradle and all” translates to “Rock a bye baby, on the treetop, when the wind Smurfs, the cradle will rock, when the bough Smurfs, the cradle will fall, and down will Smurf baby, cradle and all.”
I know – not much of a translation but I think I’m going to run with it anyway. If nothing else, it Might help provide some authenticity to dialogue I have trouble with anyway.))
Before the Red Cap has a chance to stir from its magically-induced sleep, Clockwork bends down and lifts its scythe. Spinning at his waist, the wooden robot pivots and hurls the weapon off into the forest; well out of reach should the creature awaken.
Meanwhile, Apprentice crouches down and picks
up the glowing green stone that struck Actor.
He begins inspecting it, searching for magic runes that may give some
indication of the rock’s enchantments.
Grumpf alights beside him, “You found a treasure?” the dragon mentally
inquires as the glow fades from the stone.
Actor
steps over to the fallen Red Cap and draws his sword, a prop weapon used in so
many of the drama he has performed in over the years, “Foul
creature! For your crimes against the Smurfs and for the wanton destruction of
the dam over the River Smurf, I, Actor Smurf, do sentence you to
death!" Actor plunges his rapier
down at the slumbering fairy and the blade of his sword bends backwards, unable
to pierce the monster’s enchanted hide.
The evil fairy snores for a moment before
making a sharp “Snort” and wiping at its face with one and mumbling to
itself. It is apparent that Apprentice’s
spell will not keep the creature asleep for much longer.
- - - - -As the Red Cap begins to stir, Apprentice sticks the stone into his pocket before facing his friends, “We need to leave…Now.” The green-scaled Smurf is already in motion heading for the edge of the clearing and away from the limestone cave before he finishes his sentence.
Actor fervently agrees with him and gives
chase.
Clockwork hefts his log once more, ready to
brain the unconscious fey. Shouts from
the other party members draw his attention and, reluctantly, he falls in to
step behind them. His head pivots on his
shoulders to face behind him as he walks into the woods.
Of Grumpf, there is no sign but the last thing
the wooden robot sees as the clearing disappears from view is the Red Cap
sitting up and scratching its head. The
wiry, jagged-toothed fairy rises to its feet and begins to stomp the ground,
“TRICKSY SMURFS!” the Red Cap shouts, “WE HATES THEM! WE HATES THEM FOREVER!”
The trio of Smurfs race into the woods as fast
as their tiny legs will carry them and after what seems like an eternity
finally slows their pace to a much more reasonable walk.
((The group did not try to interrogate
the Red Cap. I am curious to see how
they are going to try to convince any of the Smurfs back in the village of what
really happened when all they have is purely circumstantial evidence – burned
wrapping paper and ribbon from Jokey’s exploded presents)).
- - - - -The group makes their flight from the Red Cap’s lair with Clockwork constantly watching their back trail to make sure that they aren’t being followed. Actor limps along, assessing his injury. His tiny blue fingers probe his ribs and searing pain radiates out from every spot he touches – if they aren’t broken, they are certainly badly bruised or maybe cracked. Still, he doesn’t have any trouble breathing unless he takes a really big breath or tries to exert himself overmuch. Grumpf rejoins the group, flying in from overhead and apologizes for his brief absence.
Apprentice begins looking around, “We should
find a place to settle for the night, a little farther away from here.” The wizard throws a glance back over his
shoulder even though Clockwork has not warned the Smurf pack of the Red Cap
being in pursuit. Still, the thought
keeps rolling over in his mind, “What if it comes after us? Will a Sleep spell work again? And what is the significance of Jokey’s
presents being at the dam? There are a
lot of unanswered questions right now.”
Actor:
28% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
100% health
Grumpf:
100% health
- - - - -Grumpf circles back to make sure that the Smurfs aren’t being followed while the rest of the group makes ready to camp for the night. Apprentice backs slowly away from the campsite, swishing his tail across the ground to obscure the group’s tracks before rejoining the group. When he returns, he discovers that Actor is already lying down, holding his side, hoping that by morning he will feel better. Clockwork has taken up a sentry position and is whistling a sedate tune to help ease the Smurfs into slumber.
Grumpf flies back into the camp having found
no signs of pursuit only to discover Actor soundly sleeping while Apprentice
examines the stone recovered from the Red Cap back at the limestone cave. For all intents and purposes, it seems that
the rock is simply that – a rock. There
are no runes, no etchings, no arcane marks of any kind inscribed upon the
surface of the stone.
The hours pass and Clockwork maintains his
overnight vigil, whistling and humming to the accompaniment of Smurf snores
when he hears a crunching in the snow.
Actor:
43% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
100% health
Grumpf:
100% health
((I do not know if the Player had Clockwork whistle
specifically to lure the Red Cap into another confrontation or not but I am
thankful that he did because Brindleshanks has information that the party needs
to complete their mission the way I had planned on it going. If they had failed to interrogate the Red Cap
and returned to the Smurf Village, then all they would have had was
circumstantial evidence that a Smurf, probably Jokey, had been down at the dam
site. This will at least give them a
second chance to learn that King Smurf and Triple-S were the ones who had
planted the presents that were used to blow up the dam)).
- - - - -Clockwork looks around, squinting as he peers into the darkness. He takes a step, his eyes sweeping back and forth. He ignores Actor’s quiet snoring and Apprentice and Grumpf’s reptilian physiology have slowed to the point where they take only one or two breaths every minute or so and they are simple to filter out from the sound he is trying to hear. He stops humming and listens to the world around him. No heartbeat, no respiration, no sound of blood pumping through the veins he does not have – all of these eliminate biological background noises that the living have to deal with.
Then he hears it again, a crunch of a footstep
on the frozen surface of the snow. He
spins and comes face-to-face with the Red Cap as it swings its scythe, just
barely skimming the ground as the blade rushes at him. Clockwork leaps and the cutting edge passes
just under his feet. “I FINDS YOU!” the
Red Cap howls. “AND NOW I GETS TO EATS
YOU, NASTY SMURFSES! FINDED ME SCYTHE
YOU TRIED TO HIDE IN THE WOODS TOO!”
- - - - -Actor begins to sing a childhood tune. “Smurf-a-bye baby on the treetop, when the wind blows, the cradle will rock, when the bough breaks, the cradle will fall and down will Smurf baby, cradle and all.” Magic is woven into Actor’s voice. Notes and chords intermingle with the subtle enchantment and seep through cracks in the Red Cap’s will. The fairy’s head nods forward and his eyelids become heavy but then it snarls and shakes its head, fighting free of the spell’s influence.
Apprentice hurls a fistful of sand at
the fairy’s face. The Red Cap jerks its head to side, protecting his eyes from
the stinging particles as the wizard shouts out the word “Sleep!” The monster continues to snarl and stalks
forward, a long line of drool hanging from the corner of its mouth. It swipes its scythe at the reptilian Smurf
but Apprentice sprawls flat on the ground and the blade whooshes by overhead.
The Red Cap checks his swing and
brings the scythe back around for another slash but Clockwork leaps into the
fray and grabs the weapon by the haft. The tiny wooden robot strains against
the vile fairy with the strength of one-hundred Smurfs. Wooden gears spin,
driving toothed wheels that turn a shaft that pushes pistons up and down
tirelessly. But, for all of his mechanical might, the Red Cap, capable of
wrestling a full-grown human to the ground, is stronger still. The evil fairy
bears down on his scythe, forcing it ever closer to his little blue opponent. Clockwork is forced to bend backwards at the
waist. Clockwork hears a loud CRACK as
one the teeth on his ratchet wheel cracks and shears off. The robot Smurf’s main spring unwinds in an
instant, smashing into the smaller gears, cogs, and stops housed inside his
chest cavity. Splinters ricochet around
inside the cabinet, puncturing his sarsaparilla reservoir causing warm soup to
spray the remaining functional mechanisms. Clockwork’s body goes limp and he falls to
the ground like a marionette with its strings cut. The Red Cap steps over the tiny construct and
smiles at the two remaining Smurfs.
((I didn’t intervene this time to save
a PC. They fought the Red Cap once
already and managed to put it to sleep but Smurfs trying to fight this thing
would be like a man fighting a giant.
It’s just that much bigger and stronger than they are. I resolved the fight as a Grapple between the
Red Cap and Clockwork. The fairy won and
dealt 1d2+its Strength bonus to the wooden robot, more than enough to reduce
him to 0 hp. That said, Clockwork can be
repaired so he isn’t out of the adventure yet.
I think it will be interesting to see how the players react and what
they do afterwards)).
- - - - -Clockwork twitches a little and his eyes move back and forth, watching the fight between the Red Cap and his friends. With their physically most powerful member down, the Smurfs spread out. Actor falls back a few step and thinking that he won’t fail to kill the Red Cap this time cries out, “Verdoving!” The evil fairy pauses, unsteady on his feet, his eyes glazed and unfocused and the thespian fey shouts out in victory.
Apprentice moves
forward instead of back, trying to close the gap between himself and the Red
Cap. He flings more sand, this time a
handful of three colors that have been mixed together and speaks the words
“Kleur Spray!” A fan of light bursts
from his outstretched hand. The blast
hits the Red Cap squarely in the face, knocking him onto his back as Grumpf
lands and rakes with the claws. The
dragon’s nails do little damage but the barbed stinger on the end of his tail
slashes in, barely piercing the skin but injecting a powerful venom into the
fairy’s bloodstream. The Red Cap slumps,
going completely limp beneath the dragon.
Actor:
43% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
0% health
Grumpf:
100% health
- - - - -Clockwork lolls his head back and forth, trying to see what is going on from his vantage point but is unable to move any farther than that.
With the Red Cap once again rendered insensate
by the party, Actor goes and grabs the largest rock he can lift and staggers
back toward the unconscious fairy.
Grumpf lands, digging his claws into the Red Cap’s shoulders and presses
him to the ground so he cannot stir or, should he awaken, dodge aside from the
stone as Actor brings it down upon his head.
Actor brings the rock down with all of his might and there is a dull
thud as the rock bounces away, leaving not so much as a scratch on the Red
Cap’s iron-hard flesh.
Apprentice chants the words to a spell and a
bluish-beam of light bursts from his finger to strike the Smurf’s fallen foe,
leaving a patch of frost on the creature’s chest. The assault does nothing to disturb the Red
Cap’s drugged slumber and given its seeming immunity to any physical assault
the Smurfs may mount, the idea that perhaps attacking the monster isn’t the
best use of their time begins to nag at the back of their little blue minds.
Actor:
43% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
0% health
Grumpf:
100% health
- - - - -As the Smurf adventurers and Grumpf stand over the dozing Red Cap, the pseudodragon growls in frustration, “Well, SMURF! What can we do to make sure he can’t hurt anyone else?”
Actor kneels beside Clockwork, trying to
arrange his parts neatly enough to make transporting the wooden robot back to
town a bit easier. Apprentice looks
around, searching for something that can be used to bind the drugged
fairy. Most of the vines in sight are
too slender or too frozen by the winter’s snow to serve that purpose. Then he lays eyes on one of the springs
sticking out of Clockwork’s chest. With
a quick apology, he grabs the flexible metal wire, plants his foot and
pulls. The spring comes loose in his
hand on the third try. The reptilian
Smurf then wraps the coil tightly around the Red Cap’s feet and stretches it
out to wrap the other end around its wrists.
Once the vile fairy is securely bound, he
begins slapping him in the face, rousing it from its drugged slumber. “You are going to answer some questions for
us.”
- - - - -With the Red Cap bound with springs pulled from Clockwork’s chest, Actor stands atop the fallen fairy and begins asking him questions. Actor stands by, ready to “up the ante” should the vicious creature prove to be intractable.
“Why did you destroy the dam? What was there
to gain from it? Why did you want to start a war?"
The fairy looks up at the reptilian
spellcaster and begins to laugh.
“Stuuupid Smurfses! Wasn’t me
that blowed the dam. Was Smurfses that
blowed the dam! I watches and I
laughs. Was great fun and great fire!”
“LIAR!” Actor bellows, “What do you mean it
was Smurfs that destroyed the dam? We
know it was you!”
“Hahaha…not me, not me. I watches only! Big fire go boom! Wood go boom!
Water whooshes out! So much
destroyed!” The Red Cap stops laughing
and looks directly at Actor, “Smurfses destroy the dam. Friends of yours? Smurf is black, Smurf with stoopid gold pants
and cloak? They know. They know.”
- - - - -The Smurfs react angrily toward the Red Cap’s revelation, calling him a liar and demanding that he tell them the truth. The vile fairy continues to laugh, “BETRAYED BY THEIR OWN! SMURFSES FOOLED FROM WITHIN! BWA HA HA!”
“ONE IN GOLD!
ONE IN BLACK! MAKE BIG BOOM! LET THE WATER RUN! ONE IN GOLD! ONE IN BLACK!
MAKE BIG BOOM! LET THE WATER
RUN! ONE IN GOLD! ONE IN BLACK!
MAKE BIG BOOM! LET THE WATER RUN!” The Red Cap bellows his merriment, laughing
at his captors as he repeats his words in a sing-sing voice at the top of his
lungs.
The fairy stops suddenly, eyeing the gathered
blue fey and their draconic companion. A
wide grin splits his face, revealing his long razor sharp teeth. “Helps you I will. Tells the other Smurfses what I sees. Watch them tear apart thems what did the
boom. Great fun for me!”
Actor:
43% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
0% health
Grumpf:
100% health
((I really thought that the group would clue
in on the guilty party by this point.
One little typo where I said ‘Smurf is black’ instead of ‘Smurf IN
black’ seems to have thrown the entire investigation out of whack. Let this be a lesson to all you – SpellCheck
is NOT the same as Proofreading)).
- - - - -Apprentice asks what his companions think. Actor frowns at the Red Cap, “I don’t trust him. Do not untie him. How can you help us?” The pseudodragon, his tail lashing back and forth impatiently like a cat, offers to fly the fairy back to the village so he can tell the other Smurfs what he saw. Clockwork continues to lay immobilized on the ground but his springs begin to rewind themselves and his cracked cog starts to mend itself.
The Red Cap laughs maliciously, “Yes! Yes!
GREAT FUN! Watch the Smurfses
hate each other! Watch them tear each other apart! The dark fey sits up, shifting
his feet underneath him and stands before beginning to dance in circles, “Tear
and Smash! Make into Hash! Smurfses going to die! Laugh and sing, all day long, spit into their
eyes!” The fairy stops and smiles at the
group, his grin broadening into a wide leer.
“Whats is we waiting for? Going
home with you! Will tell them all the
TRUTH! Hahahahahahahahaha!”
- - - - -Actor agrees to Grumpf’s suggestion and begins looking for two things – the first a blindfold to cover the vile fairy’s eyes so it cannot see the way to the village and the second thing being a large rock or bludgeon to knock the creature unconscious once more.
Apprentice objects loudly, berating the
thespian and Actor responds in kind. The
two begin to argue over the wisdom of bringing the Red Cap to the village and
it begins to cackle loudly. The creature
bounces in place, delighted to see the Smurfs fighting amongst themselves. “YES!
YES! HIT HIM WITH ROCK! Spill the green Smurfses’ brains on the
ground!”
Grumpf circles the pair, watching the argument
while Clockwork’s clockworks continue to mend.
The springs have nearly recoiled completely and his broken cogs are
beginning to knit themselves back together and he is able to pull himself up
into a sitting position.
- - - - -After about an hour, Clockwork’s internal components have repaired themselves enough so he can walk again.
With the Red Cap’s hands bound behind his back
and eyes covered with a blindfold, the party starts marching back toward Smurf
Village. Despite tripping every so often
on unseen rocks and roots along the forest trail, the evil fairy chuckles as he
walks, giggling incessantly as he talks to the group in a sing-song voice,
“GONNA GO TO YOUR HOMESES. GOING TO TELL
EVERYONE WHATS I SEEN. SMURFSES WON’T
BELIEVE. SMURFS BLAMES YOUS FOR
EVERYTHING. GOOD FUN. GOOD FUN.”
Actor:
43% health
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
33% health
Grumpf:
100% health
- - - - -While the party walks along with the Red Cap in tow, Apprentice cracks open his spellbook and reads, skimming the pages as he refreshes his memory. Actor stops the group for a moment and binds the vile fairy’s mouth with a gag so it will quit talking.
The Red Cap accepts this treatment with
surprising mildness, making the thespian wonder if perhaps it has something
planned. After about an hour, the wall
surrounding the village comes into view.
The sun is just climbing into the sky, tinting the clouds above with
pink and orange hues.
A handful of Smurfs are already up and about,
starting their daily tasks and when they see the bound fairy approaching behind
Apprentice, Actor, Clockwork, and Grumpf, they scatter. In moments, all of the Smurfs have retreated
from view, leaving the village streets empty and deserted.
((It’s been awhile since I posted on this
adventure. Two players never
responded to the last post and, to be honest, I’ve had my hands full writing
the narrative for the battle taking place in the actual campaign. Plus, I have to wonder if I didn’t make my
clues “clue-y” enough. I mean, I figured
by now, the party would have figured out that King Smurf and Secret Service
Smurf are behind the whole ‘destruction of the dam’ thing. I don’t know.
Gonna ride this out and see what happens.))
- - - - -While Grumpf interposes himself between the Red Cap and the Smurfs, Actor, Apprentice, and Clockwork lead the vile fairy through the village right up to the front steps of King Smurf’s castle. The King, who has been made aware of the party’s approach, is standing out front with Triple-S at his side. The black clad Smurf stands at the king’s side in a manner of relaxed wariness, hands hidden inside his long black overcoat.
When the group reaches the bottom step, Actor
calls out loudly, to all of the Smurfs cowering in their homes, “Behold, we
have brought this Red Cap to testify about the attack that destroyed the dam
over the River Smurf that nearly flooded our village! Listen to his words, and learn the truth!”
Apprentice removes the gag from the vicious
Red Cap and the fairy begins to laugh, a sound that sends chills down the
spines of all who hear it.
“Yesssss…. I saw everything,
everything. Knows what happened, I
does. Tells you all. Hates it you will!”
The fairy looks up at King Smurf and grins,
his long, serrated teeth gleaming in the early morning light.
The King smiles, “I don’t think this foul
creature has anything to say that is worth hearing.” The Smurf leader gives Triple-S a barely
perceptible nod and the bodyguard produces a small crossbow with a ratcheted
box on top from within his coat and points it at the Red Cap and begins turning
the winch. Bolts tipped with iron burst
from the crossbow, flying through the air to strike the fairy in the face and
chest. The cold iron punches through the
fairy’s skin and it drops to the ground, hissing and writhing in pain.
Panic spreads throughout the village as Secret
Service Smurf descends the stairs, cranking the winch and sending shaft after
shaft hurtling forward. The fairy kicks
and screams as the iron burns into his flesh, leaving gaping holes in its
preternaturally tough hide.
((There is no way that the King is going to
take the chance that the Red Cap could actually know the truth of what happened
at the dam. There is no upside for him
if that happens. So, he’s going to have
Secret Service Smurf kill the thing before it can talk. Hopefully, this will set off some alarms with
the players and get them to step in and stop things before the Red Cap is
killed. If not, the fairy will die and
Triple-S will be portrayed as a hero, further cementing King Smurf’s hold over
the village)).
- - - - -Grumpf throws himself in between the fallen Red Cap and Triple-S. He spreads his wings to shield the fallen fairy and roars (or makes a noise as close as possible to a roar given that he is a pseudodragon). Actor shouts at the king’s bodyguard, ordering him to stop and listen to what the Red Cap has to say. Apprentice snarls, his reptilian visage hostile and almost savage as he flexes his claws. He bellows at the top of his lungs for the King, Triple-S, and the Smurfs cowering in their homes to listen to what the Red Cap has to say.
Triple-S pauses, unsure of whether or not he
should continue firing and throws a look to King Smurf. The Smurf sovereign raises one hand slightly
and the black-clad Smurf lowers his crossbow.
“Fine. We will listen to this
monster’s lies, for the sake of argument and then we will decide how to sentence
the war criminal, and possibly the traitors in our midst.”
The Red Cap rises to his feet and pulls out
the two quarrels and tosses them aside.
It points at the King and Triple-S, “They dids it. They blowed up the dam! Big fire!
Big boom! Water goes whoosh! Saw them I did. Watched and clapped and danced in the ashes
when they fell.”
Apprentice:
100% health
Clockwork:
33% health
Grumpf:
100% health
Brindleshanks:
72% health
((Go figure.
The group spends all this time trying to kill the Red Cap and now that
someone else is trying to kill him, they leap to his defense. I would have sworn that at one point I had a
picture of a Smurf in a black trenchcoat but after looking through my flash
drive and a brief internet search I came up with nothing – which is frustrating
to no end – so I edited this picture instead and went without the coat)).
Secret
Service Smurf (a.k.a. Triple-S): Smurf male Fighter 2
CR: 2 Tiny Fey HD: 2d10+2 Hp: 17
Init:
+1 Spd: 10’ AC: 14 (+2 Size, +2 Dex); t: 14, ff: 12
Attacks:
(BAB+2; Grap -8); +2 Unarmed Strike: 1-2 or +6 (+4/+4
w/ Rapid Shot) Tiny Repeating Crossbow: 1d4 (19-20/x2, 80’)
SA: -
-
SQ:
Manifesto; The Smurfiest; Wild Empathy
Align:
N Saves: Fort +3 Ref +0
Will +0
Str:
6 (-2) Dex: 14 (+2) Con: 12 (+1) Int: 11 (+0) Wis: 12 (+1) Cha: 12 (+1)
Skills: Read/Write and Speak Common (Smurf dialect); Climb +2; Handle
Animal +3; Intimidate +8; Jump +6; Ride +4
Feats: Skill Focus (Intimidate) (b); Exotic Weapon
Proficiency (Repeating Crossbow); Point Blank Shot (b); Rapid Shot (b);
Gear: Black Trousers, Black Phrygian Cap; Black Overcoat; Tiny Light
Repeating Crossbow (and two cartridges with 5 bolts each);
• The
Smurfiest (Ex): Gains Skill Focus (pick one) as a bonus feat
•
Manifesto (Ex): A Smurf gains a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls and a +2
bonus to Diplomacy if within 20’ of another Smurf.
CR:
2 Tiny Fey HD: 3d8
Hp: 16
Init:
+1 Spd: 10’ AC: 13 (+2 Size, +1 Dex); t: 13, ff: 12
Attacks:
(BAB+1; Grap -9); +1 Unarmed Strike: 1-2 or +1 Scepter: 1d3-2
(20/x2)
SA: -
-
SQ:
Manifesto; The Smurfiest; Wild Empathy
Align:
N Saves: Fort +1 Ref +2
Will +4
Str:
6 (-2) Dex: 12 (+1) Con: 10 (+0) Int: 14 (+2) Wis: 12 (+1) Cha: 14 (+2)
Languages: Read/Write and
Speak Common (Smurf dialect) and Sylvan
Skills: Bluff +9; Diplomacy +16; Disguise +2; Gather Information +7; Knowledge (Local - Great and Awful Forest) +7; Knowledge (Local - Smurf Village) +7; Perform (Oratory) +7; Sense Motive +8; Sleight of Hand +3
Feats: Negotiator;
Persuasive; Skill Focus (Diplomacy) (b);
Gear: Gold Trousers, Gold Phrygian Cap; Golden Crown; Red Cloak with fur trim
fastened with golden brooch; Scepter (as Tiny Light Mace)
• The Smurfiest (Ex): Gains Skill Focus
(pick one) as a bonus feat
• Manifesto (Ex): A Smurf gains a +1
bonus to attack and damage rolls and a +2 bonus to Diplomacy if within 20’ of
another Smurf.
- - -
- -Clockwork turns toward King Smurf and stalks forward, reaching to grab him, “You are under arrest. Do not resist.” The King stands there and smiles, “Of course, but you’ll only be serving that vile creature’s interest. Can’t you see that this is exactly what he wants - us fighting among ourselves?”
Grumpf rears up, wings flaring, and spits
flame at Secret Service Smurf. The agent
rolls to one side, throwing himself down the stairs to avoid most of the
blast. As he rises to his feet at the
base of the steps, he raises his crossbow and takes aim at the dragon.
“HOLD YOUR FIRE!” the king calls out. Triple-S throws an incredulous look at the
king and lowers his weapon.
“Every Smurf, please, hear my words. We have been betrayed. I asked these three Smurfs to investigate the
destruction of the dam that nearly flooded our village. They bravely marched into the woods and
searched for our enemy. But, then, they
were deceived. This … disgusting beast …
has lied and manipulated our champions.
His honeyed words have seeped in like poison, blackening their hearts
and turning them against us.”
The remaining villagers begin to emerge from
their homes, slowly converging on the palace as they listen to what the king is
saying. Some nods their heads, some
mouth words like “those poor Smurfs” and look upon Clockwork, Actor, and
Apprentice with pity in their eyes.
- - - - -Grumpf stares down at Secret Service Smurf, ready to attack if the black-clad bodyguard doesn’t stand down but directs his thoughts toward Actor, Apprentice, Clockwork and the Red Cap, “Do you have any proof against these two other than your word?”
The wounded faerie smiles viciously, long
strands of drool escaping from his lips, “Ohhhh yesss…. All the proof we
need. Saw them,” he points at Actor and
Apprentice, “back at the dam, sifting through the sticks. Saw what they found. Saw it I did.”
King Smurf seems nonplussed as the Red Cap
makes his declaration but Triple-S shifts unsteadily from one foot to the
other. “Whatever this wretched being
claims to have discovered amounts to nothing.
Anyone can say they have proof but I see none brought before me. I see none brought here to be presented to
our gathered kin. That means
different things for different Smurfs. Some Smurfs don't want to believe the
truth and I understand that. Other Smurfs want to believe comforting lies and
be led down an easier path. But all
Smurfs, if they want to fight terror, must do something. Over
time it's going to be important for Smurfs
to know they will be held accountable for inactivity," he said.
"You're either with us or against us in the fight against terror."
- - - - -“THEN EXPLAIN THIS!” Apprentice proclaims as he pulls one of the scraps of yellow wrapping paper and red ribbon from one of his pouches. “We found this and dozens more like it at the dam. They were all over the place! Recognize them? They’re from one of Jokey’s surprise presents and Jokey has been locked in Your dungeon for months now! The only way they could have gotten to the dam was if you, or if you and Secret Service Smurf took them there and used them to blow up the dam!”
A crowd of Smurfs has begun to gather before
the steps to King Smurf’s castle. They stay well away from the wounded Red Cap,
making sure to keep the adventuring trio and the dragon between themselves at
it.
King Smurf laughs, “Ha! I am afraid you are mistaken my scaly
friend. Anyone in the village could have
gone into Jokey’s home and taken his presents.
We aren’t humans who lock our doors to keep our neighbors out. We aren’t one of those abominable Red Caps
who seek glory in carnage and death! We
are Smurfs! Throwing accusations around
baselessly like that is not what we do!
We are One People, One Village, united in our efforts to live peacefully
with each other, to support each other in times of need, to enjoy the fruits of
our fellowship and keep each other safe.
Perhaps I was wrong about you, all three of you. I thought that by reaching out to you, that
by trying to bring you into the folds of our community, that I could help you
feel more accepted despite your strange appearances, your bizarre behaviors,
your strange and dangerous taste in companions.
For that, I apologize to all of our brethren for allowing you to
endanger them by bringing a dangerous, murderous beast into our midst and I
must beg their forgiveness.”
“By the authority vested in me by our fellow
Smurfs, I hereby banish you from our village!
You may stop and gather whatever you deem necessary from your homes but
you will leave this village before the hour is out and you take That Foul Thing
with you!”
((A roll for King Smurf’s Diplomacy check
resulted in a 3 (+18) =21. Not an
insurmountable roll for the upcoming opposed roll on the part of whoever
decides to rebuff his accusations. It
has been several weeks since I have responded to the last Smurf post. I have been busy doing other things for the
main campaign and researching ideas for upcoming adventures but it is time to
wrap this story up and move on to whatever it is I have coming up next)).
- - - - -Clockwork, having heard an order given by the King stops what he is doing and begins to walk toward his mushroom house to gather his few things so he can leave the village.
Grumpf
snarls at Triple-S. “I am not finished
with you.”
Actor
Smurf steps forward and clears his throat.
His voice, long practiced in the thespian arts rings out loud and clear,
carrying over the village so that all may hear him. “My Fellow Smurfs, the folly that is upon us
cannot be ignored. I look around that
village and see Handy, who built my house.
I see Baker, who makes my bread.
I see trustworthy loyal Smurfs, one and all, I see no Smurf who would go
into Jokey Smurf’s house with him not there.
I see no No Smurf that would take his possessions. To what gain would a Smurf benefit from such
treatment? Even this fiendish Red Cap,
an evil being who wants to kill us where we stand, can see through this
ruse. Ask yourselves, my friends, my
brothers, my Smurf family, who gains most by us causing division and mistrust
in our once peaceful and harmonious village?
Who is to benefit but those in power?
It was not until we had this strongman and his lackey that there has
been dissention among our brotherhood.
Look inside yourself and you will see the truth. What Smurf would turn his back on his fellow
brother Smurf and banish his comrade from the loving arms of our formerly
harmonious village? Look inside yourself
to feel the truth, my brothers.”
The
gathered fey begin to murmur amongst themselves, looking around the crowd and
nodding as Actor’s words sink in. Even
Reporter and Editor Smurf, long-time supporters of King Smurf nod their head in
approval. Some grumbling stirs through
the crowd. The King feels the mood shift
and he takes a step back, glancing to Secret Service Smurf for support.
The
Red Cap smiles viciously and yells, “’ANG HIM!
I’LL DO IT FOR YOU! JUSTS GIVESES
HIM TO MEEEE!” The vile fairy’s words
have an unexpectedly galvanizing effect on the crowd and they begin to
yell. Smurf berries sail through the air
to pummel both the king and his bodyguard. The two
Smurfs begin to back toward the safety of the castle as the crowd begins to
close in.
((Actor
rolled a 15 on his Perform check so I went with it. Plus, this story has dragged on far too long
and I would like to bring it to a close.))
- - -
- -
As the King and Triple-S back away from the
rain of smurfberries being hurled at them, Apprentice turns around and slaps
the ground with his tail. “Move one more
step and I will not hold back!” Grumpf takes that moment to strike and leaps
onto Secret Service Smurf bearing him to the ground. The pseudodragon pins the black-clad Smurf’s
arms against his chest, keeping the bodyguard from bringing his crossbow to
bear and knocking off his black-lensed spectacles.
Clockwork comes to a stop and turns
around. He sees the mob of blue fey throwing
fruit at what may possibly be their deposed leader and the dragon sitting atop
Secret Service Smurf. The wooden robot
lets out a shrill whistle, “TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!” and
then continues speaking in a series of clicks and whistles. “HALT YOUR HOSTILE ACTIONS. IT IS UNLAWFUL
FOR ANY SMURF TO HURT ANOTHER. I'M NOT SAYING TO RELEASE THE RED CAP BUT HE IS
NOT BOUND BY SMURF LAW.” The automaton’s
implication being that the Red Cap would do their dirty work for them.
Actor tries to calm the crowd. He says,
"My Smurfs, let no harm come to these false leaders. They tried to profit
from our fears. We are not cowardly Smurfs. We are not going to go down the
road of mob rule and form a lynch mob to deal with these imposters. Let justice
prevail. Apprehend them and let them stand trial for crimes against us!"
The Red Cap cackles in glee and capers around
as the crowd begins to transform into a mob.
((There is a game called “Meat Fairy” where a
hunter once shared a meal of rabbit with a fairy in the woods. That fairy became addicted to eating flesh
and before long spread that desire to pretty much every other fairy in the
world. Eventually, one fairy had tasted
another, found his fellow delicious, and war broke out as now cannibalistic
faeries turned on one another to sate their cravings. Only isolated fey who had never tasted flesh
(like the Smurfs) or those who fled to Neverland were spared this cruel fate of
eat or be eaten. But I want to touch
upon the general theme of “Meat Fairy” and have the NPC Smurfs consumed with
thoughts of revenge upon their oppressor.))
- - - - -“HOLD STILL” Grumpf snarls directly into Triple-S’s mind, “or I will let the crowd have their way with you!” Apprentice remains close by the dragon, keeping an eye on the king and his bodyguard to ensure there is no chance for last-second treachery from either of them.
Clockwork turns his head and sees that the
Smurfs are midway through the transformation from a crowd into a vengeful mob
and toots and whistles, “Oh my, the crowd is gone” while standing out of their
way and not doing anything more.
Actor tries to talk the crowd down some more
but upon realizing that they are not listening to the passive fellow he has
been so far, decides that something more robust is needed and sternly address the mob, "Stop this now you heartless Smurfs! If
it is a lynching you want them by all means let us think of a suitable way to
bring these wretched Smurfs some much needed justice! He looks over to the Red
Cap. Shall we let this fiend handle our
dirty work? Do we let the dragon broil
him? I know Gargamel would love to have a few Smurfs delivered to his door
step!" Actor’s voice grows more forceful with each word he utters. "First thing we will do is release our
imprisoned brothers. Use your righteous anger to storm the castle. Free our brother so that he may enjoy this
retribution!"
The crowd roars and surges forward, crashing
through the castle’s double doors and nearly knocking them from their
hinges. The blue fey rampage through the
castle, snatching back belongings taken from them by the King’s taxes and they
make their way down into the dungeon.
Keys are snatched from a peg on the wall and the door to the prison cell
is thrown open. Jokey laughs and shouts,
“SURPRISE!” as he is freed from his months-long imprisonment.
Meanwhile, on the steps to the castle,
Clockwork, Apprentice, Actor and Grumpf have to reach a decision as to what
punishment should behalf their erstwhile ruler.
((I am so ready for this adventure to be done
– time to wrap it up and let the players decide what happens next)).
- - - - -The three Smurfs and the dragon decide to imprison King Smurf and his body guard in the dungeon of the castle and force them to work off their debt to the village. While there is some grumbling from the remainder of the village, everyone eventually agrees.
The adventuring fey declare that the village
does not need a ruler in Papa Smurf’s absence and that each Smurf living there
will tend to their duties just as they always have. If a matter of grave importance rises, then a
town meeting will be held and everyone will decide together what needs to be
done.
The Red Cap is blindfolded once more and led
away from the mushroom community and released into the woods. Grumpf carries the three Smurfs away to avoid
leaving tracks and they return home, their adventure finally at an end.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Smurf (Player Character Race)
CR: ¼ Tiny Fey HD: 1d6 Hp: 3
Init: +1 Spd: 10’ AC: 13 (+2 Size, +1 Dex); t: 13, ff: 12
Attacks: (BAB+0; Grap -10); +0 Unarmed Strike: 1-2
SA: - -
SQ: Manifesto; The Smurfiest; Wild Empathy
Align: Usually NG Saves: Fort +0, Ref +3, Will +1
Str: 6, Dex: 12, Con: 10, Int: 11, Wis: 12, Cha: 12
Skills: skill points equal to (6+Int modifier/HD, quadrupled at 1st level); A Smurf has Craft, Handle Animal, Hide, Jump, Knowledge (Nature), Move Silently, Perform, and Profession as class skills OR by character class
Feats: Skill Focus (b) plus one other
• The Smurfiest (Ex): Gains Skill Focus (pick one) as a bonus feat
• Manifesto (Ex): A Smurf gains a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls and a +2 bonus to diplomacy if within 20’ of another Smurf.
Racial Abilities Modifiers: -2 Str, +2 Dex; gain a +4 racial bonus to Jump checks
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