The Condiment King

I was watching YouTube yesterday and “The Return of the Condiment King” popped up in my suggested videos list.  For those of you who don’t remember, Condiment King was introduced back in the Bat-Man: The Animated Series and has made multiple appearances in the comics, the Bat-Man Lego Movie, and in a couple of other places in the intervening years.  I sat down, watched the video, did a little Googling and promptly adapted him into the d20 system for use as a possible NPC.  (And for you Grognards out there, I’ve included an AD&D 2nd edition version as well).

DC Canon lists two “real” names for this character – Mitchell Mayo and Buddy Standler.  In my version of this character, Mitchell is the real name as “Buddy” is a stage name for his career as a stand-up comedian.  I abbreviated some of Mitchell’s history, leaving out his exposure to the Joker Toxin (during the events of Joker’s Last laugh) but did include his confinement to Arkham Asylum due to the lingering effects of the Mad Hatter’s mind control chip that was used on him by the Joker.

This is what I came up with.  I hope you enjoy.

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“The big bad Bat-Guy.  I knew you’d ketchup to me sooner or later.  How I relished this meeting.  You, the dynamic Dark Knight, versus me, the conceptual Condiment King!  Come, Bat-Man.  Let’s see if you can cut the mustard.” – The Condiment King

Condiment King (Mitchell Mayo a.k.a. Buddy Mitchell)
CR: 1Male Human Gadgeteer 1
N Medium Humanoid
Init: +1, Senses: Listen +0, Spot +0
Languages: Read/Write and Speak English

AC: 13 (Costume, +1 Dex); t: 11, ff: 12
Hp: 8 (1HD)
Energy: 12
Immune: - -
Fort +0, Ref +1, Will +2

Spd: 30’ (6 squares)
Melee +0 Unarmed: 1d3 nonlethal
Ranged Touch +1 Ketchup or Mustard Gun: see belowCombat Gear: Ketchup Gun, Mustard Gun, Pressurized Backpack with hose attachments for guns

Str: 11, Dex: 12, Con: 11, Int: 13, Wis: 11, Cha: 15

SA: See below
SQ: See below

Feats: Dodge, Educated (Pop Culture and Superhumans) (b), Exotic Weapon Proficiency (Spray Guns) (b)
Skills: Concentration +4, Craft (Cooking) +5, Craft (Gadgetry) +5, Intimidate +4, Knowledge (Pop Culture) +5, Knowledge (Superhumans) +7, Perform (Stand-up Comedy) +4, Profession (Comedian) +4

Possessions: Condiment King Costume plus Combat GearHeight: 5’10”     Weight: 195 lbs.     Hair: Blond     Eyes: Brown

Appearance: Mitchell has thinning blond hair and what could best be described as a “doughy” physique.  His costume is a padded light blue body suit with white underwear worn on the outside of the pants, dark glasses, and a tight green “hood” with black stripes that resembles a pickle.  There is a large white “C” in the center of his chest surrounded by a black circle.  He has four small pouches on each arm that are styled to look like fast food condiment packets.

• Gadgeteer Class Abilities: Free Proficiency; Tinkering*; Gadgeteering (1, Standard)*

* The rules as written state that a Gadgeteer gains Tinkering at 1st level and Gadgeteering (Standard) at 2nd level.  In my campaign, these abilities are gained in reverse order so a Gadgeteer starts with a power at 1st level and can then modify the technology that grants it starting at 2nd level.

• Ketchup and Mustard Guns:
• Energy 7 (no recharge, see weakness below)
• Standard Energy Blast (Kinetic): Pressurized Backpack with pistols connected via hoses fires a 20’ long stream of either ketchup or mustard.
                Energy Cost: 1
                Amplifier: The condiment trails left along the path of the weapons’ spray are incredibly slippery.  Any creature crossing over one of these trails must make a Reflex save (DC11) or fall.  This save is repeated on each round that the creature remains in the area of the trail.  A creature can cross over these trails at half normal speed with a DC10 Balance check.  Failure means it cannot move and must make a Reflex save or fall.  The spray trail dries out after about 10 minutes and is no longer slippery.
                Amplifier: The pressurized spray is powerful enough to push a target backwards several feet, in a manner to a Bull Rush attack with the spray having an effective score of 16 (18 if both guns are used against the same target).

                Reducer: Maximum range is 20’.

                Reducer: No damage

Weaknesses:

• No recharge.  The Ketchup and Mustard Guns must be refilled with their respective sauces manually and then the tanks are charged with an air compressor.  This process takes roughly one hour.

AD&D 2nd Edition stats

Condiment King (Mitchell Mayo a.k.a. Buddy Mitchell): N Human male Bard (Jester kit) 1

AC: 13 (Padded Armor, Fool’s Luck)
MV: 12
HD: 1(d6)
Hp: 6
Saves: PPD: 13; RSW 14, PP: 12, BW: 16, Sp: 15
THAC0: 20
# Att: 1+1
Dmg: See below
Str: 11, Dex: 12, Con: 11, Int: 13, Wis: 11, Cha: 15
Wpn Prof: Condiment Guns (both starting weapon proficiencies used for these unusual Weapons)
Nonwpn Prof: Acting (b), Appraising, Cooking, Dancing (b), Disguise, Juggling (b), Tumbling (b)
SA: Jesting, Joking
SD: Fool’s Luck, A Jester’s Mind, Thief Skills (CW50%, DN25%, PP15%, RL10%)
SZ: M (5’10” tall)
ML: Unsteady (5-7)
Xp Value: 65

• Condiment Guns: Mitchell wields a pair of pistols that fire pressurized sauces in battle.  If he uses both of these weapons in the same round (as reflected above), the first suffers a -2 penalty to attack and the second suffers a -4.  These weapons deal no damage but can be used to make surfaces slippery (as Grease spell cast by a mage of equal level) or to push targets back (targets must make a Bend Bars/Lift Gate roll to resist) up to 20’.  The guns contain enough sauce for seven shots before they their tanks must be refilled.

• Fool's Luck: It is amazing to most that Jesters can survive in any situation. They are careless, foolish, and given to whimsical decisions. It is fool's luck that has saved many a Jester's life.

        Jesters receive a +1 bonus (+5% on percentile rolls) to most die rolls. This includes saving throws, initiative, surprise, proficiency checks, thief skill checks, ability checks, and ability sub-checks (e.g., bend bars/lift gates, resurrection survival, and so on). The fool's luck also adds a +1 bonus to the Jester's Armor Class.

        About the only die rolls that the fool's luck ability doesn't affect are attack rolls, damage rolls, initial character generation rolls, and Hit Die rolls.

• Jesting: Jesting is the art of projecting meaning and mood through the use of body motions. By jesting (or gesturing), a Jester may communicate a single sentence each round to anyone who rolls a successful Wisdom check with a -5 penalty. Such communication is totally silent and does not rely upon a shared language. The Jester must use his entire body for the communication; thus, he must be fully visible and within 30 feet for communication to take place.

        Jesting may be done to taunt or tease. Such jesting affects only those who are within 30 feet of the Jester and who are able to fully view him. This form of jesting causes those being jested at to roll a saving throw vs. paralyzation, with a -1 penalty per three levels of the Jester. Those who fail must immediately try to physically strike the Jester for as long as the jesting continues. The effect ends when the jesting ends. Combat strategy is ignored by those who are affected. They recklessly pass by more dangerous targets in an attempt to attack the Jester. Jesting is thus a wonderful way to break the ranks of enemy forces.

• Joking: The practice of creating and telling jokes has been elevated to an art form by the Jester; this skill can be used for many special purposes. Jokes are told in an attempt to alter encounter reactions. For any form of joke to function, the Jester must speak a language known by the recipient of the joke. Furthermore, the Jester must be within easy verbal range of the recipient.

        Such jokes require 1d10 rounds to tell, after which the audience must roll a saving throw vs. paralyzation with a -1 penalty per three levels of the Jester. Those who fail have their reactions adjusted one level in the direction desired by the Jester. However, those who succeed take the joke the wrong way and have their reactions adjusted one level in the opposite direction.

        Finally, a joke told at just the right moment can dispel the effects of fear. Such a joke requires a round to tell and enables all those affected by fear (normal or magical) to roll a second saving throw to avoid the fear (note that those affected by the fear do not immediately run away, but remain until the joke is told). If no first saving throw was allowed, then the saving throw is rolled vs. spell.

• A Jester's Mind: Jesters are immune to attacks that cause insanity. Jesters also gain a saving throw bonus equal to their level vs. wizard spells of the enchantment/charm school and priest spells of the charm sphere. (A saving throw of 1 always fails, however.)

                Furthermore, any attempt to read a Jester's mind has a percentage chance equal to the Jester's level of causing confusion in the mind reader (treat as if under the effect of a confusion spell).